Quiz: What's Your Parenting Style?

In recent years, we've accumulated plenty of labels for various parenting styles that have been introduced to us through pop culture, social media, and parenting experts: think gentle parenting, helicopter parenting, free-range parenting, and even “FAFO” parenting. But did you know that the original terms for parenting styles have been around since the 1960’s? You may have heard of the classic parenting terms “permissive”, “authoritarian”, and “authoritative”, which were identified by developmental psychologist Diana Baumrind after extensive research with preschoolers and their parents.  She explored how different parenting approaches influenced children’s behavior and development. Take the short quiz below to find out what category you tend to fall into as a parent, and how this influences your child.

Read each statement and choose the answer that best reflects how you typically respond to your child.

1. When your child breaks a rule, your first response is to:

A. Talk with them about what happened and help them understand the consequences.

B. Enforce the rule and give a clear consequence without much discussion.

C. Let it slide most of the time- kids will be kids.

2. When your child wants to negotiate bedtime, you usually:

A. Listen to their reasons and consider adjusting if it makes sense.

B. Stick to the bedtime you set; no exceptions.

C. Eventually give in if they push hard enough.

3. How often do you explain the reasons behind your rules?

A. Often- I want my child to understand the “why” behind decisions.

B. Rarely- rules are rules, and they don’t need explanation.

C. Seldom- I don’t have many rules to begin with.

4. When your child expresses big emotions, you tend to:

A. Acknowledge their feelings and help them work through it.

B. Tell them to calm down and stop overreacting.

C. Avoid conflict and try to make them happy again as quickly as possible.

5. How do you approach setting household rules?

A. I involve my child in creating some of the rules.

B. I decide the rules, and my child is expected to follow them.

C. I prefer to keep rules to a minimum and be flexible.

6. If your child refuses to do homework, you:

A. Discuss what’s getting in the way and set a plan together.

B. Insist they do it immediately, or there will be consequences.

C. Allow them to skip it if they seem upset or tired.

7. How do you handle discipline?

A. I focus on teaching and guiding rather than punishing.

B. I believe firm consequences are necessary to teach respect.

C. I don’t like confrontation and avoid disciplining when possible.

8. When your child wants to make a big decision, you:

A. Listen to their perspective, then make the decision together.

B. Make the decision for them- as their parent, I know best.

C. Let them decide, even if it might not be the best choice.

9. How do you express love and support to your child?

A. I balance affection with setting limits and expectations.

B. I provide for their needs but believe love is shown through discipline.

C. I focus heavily on keeping them happy and rarely say no.

10. If your child challenges a rule, you:

A. Hear them out and explain why the rule exists.

B. Expect them to follow the rule without questioning it.

C. Often change or let go of the rule to avoid conflict.

Scoring

• For each A, give yourself 3 points.

• For each B, give yourself 2 points.

• For each C, give yourself 1 point.

Results

10–16 points: Permissive Parenting

• You are likely warm and affectionate with your child, but struggle to set limits and provide structure. 

• While your child likely feels loved and free to express herself, a lack of boundaries can lead to difficulties with responsibility, self-regulation, and adapting to more structured environments such as school or future workplaces.

• Pairing your parental warmth with clear, consistent boundaries helps your child feel that her world is safe and predictable.

  17–24 points: Authoritarian Parenting

• You value structure, respect, and obedience.

• You likely set firm boundaries and demonstrate consistency in your parenting, but may offer less flexibility or emotional connection.

• Children raised in this style may struggle with self-expression, making decisions, academics, peer relationships, and not feeling close with their parent.

  25–30 points: Authoritative Parenting

• You set clear rules but also value your child’s perspectives and input.

• You balance warmth and structure, helping your child feel that they have a ‘secure base’ from which to go out and explore the world.

• Research shows this parenting style is most strongly linked to positive child outcomes like confidence, resilience, emotional regulation, and academic and social success.

  

This short quiz is meant to offer insight and reflection, not to diagnose or label. Parenting styles can shift depending on the situation, and are generally a result of a parent’s values, their attachment patterns, and how they were parented growing up.  If you’d like support with your parenting, your child’s behavior, or your family dynamics, play therapy and parent coaching can help! Contact me today to learn more about how I can be of service to you and your family.